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straggler bird

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Today I was sitting in the line of cars waiting for my daughter to get out of school. At this particular school they don't let parents even enter the parking lot until the busses have left. They're horribly organized, but still...

Every minute seemed like it lasted 52 years because I had forgotten to bring reading material like usual. So I just waited - which I think I do ALL to often if you ask me.

Ok seriously, could the busses just get out of the way already? Ugh, and that kid stopped to tie his shoe - GET ON THE BUS AND LEAVE.

Then I noticed this flock of birds - there was a whole group of them flying in an oblong pattern over and over and over and....you get the point. They just kept doing it. And I just kept staring, maybe it was a hypnotic oblong pattern? Or I was just bored. Either one.

And then there was the straggler bird. The one that was trying really hard but just couldn't quite catch up and stay in rhythm despite it's constant efforts. And then it hit me:

I AM THE STRAGGLER BIRD.

And then I heard myself in that bird's thoughts:

"Hey guys, wait for me, wait for me....."
"Wait, I want to come too...waaaaaaaiiit....."
"Oh woah, I almost caught up that time - hold on, why are you flying like that? Are you avoiding me?"
"But I want to come too? Can I please come too? PLEEEEASE?!!!!!"
"Wait for me!!!!"
"Oh......ok.......I see......I guess I'll just fly by this barn.....by MYSELF.......but I'm still cool, and look at how dumb you all look flying in your stupid oblong pattern anyway. Idiots- I'm SO glad I didn't catch up. Man, I would have felt stupid later. Good thing I'm the cool one."

And then I covered the 'ford' symbol on my steering wheel with the silver part of a gum wrapper because that's what straggler birds do.

But then I peeled it back off because I could hear Husband's parentally bossy words in my head, "Melissa, we don't just go putting silver gum wrapper stuff on our stearing wheel. What's wrong with you?!" And then he'd probably make me go to time out or something. Which is so uncalled for, because hello, I'm an adult, and I can cover my steering wheel with gum wrapper if I want!

And then the busses finally got out of the way.

Tomorrow I'm taking a book.

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