Aug 30, 2010

clash of the what now?

I told Husband to rent a movie we could watch together tonight.  I told him he could pick whatever he wanted.  So he did.  And he brought home a total guy movie: Clash of the Titans

I'm no Greek mythology scholar, but I've read all of the Percy Jackson books.  Even with my limited knowledge, I understand enough to know that there were NO TITANS in that whole movie.  Sure the titans were mentioned in the beginning as being the parents of the gods, but then they talk about the Kraken and blah blah blah.

So honestly - why is it named that?!!

I was curious enough to google it.  Apparently I'm not the only one with this question.  Yet I didn't find any answers.

Stupid guy movies anyway.

And honestly, what were djinn doing in the movie?  Aren't djinn Arabic?

If someone as stupid as me can clearly see these huge flaws, what were they thinking making a movie for the masses?  It's so bad, it would be like if they hired a 6 1/2 foot bald guy to play Frodo instead of weird looking Elijah Woods.

And this is what comes from watching guy movies.  So much useless information swirling around in my brain that could be thinking of something useful.  But instead it's preoccupied in thoughts of titans and Hobbits.

Aug 20, 2010

I lit the kitchen on fire AGAIN today

Well, not the actual kitchen.  Just something IN the kitchen. 

This tends to be a hobby of mine.  Not like one of those "Oooh goodie, I think I'll take up knitting" kind of hobbies.  But more like an "at least we don't have to test our smoke detectors this month" kind. 

(And who really tests their smoke detectors monthly?  Recently all the batteries needed changing in ours - which we found out when they all started going insane at 2 AM one night.  But other than that night, or when I'm lighting something on fire, I generally just forget they're there.)

I first started noticing my pyro-kitchen talents right after I got married.  Our first apartment was so crappy we didn't even have an oven.  We just had a toaster oven.  And I'm convinced that toaster ovens have a natural ability to start fires easily.  Therefore, it was hardly my fault.

Once I started a fire with one of those automatic bread machine thingies. 

There have been many incidences with the toaster.  But haven't we all set a fire with a toaster before?  Come on, be honest.

And you can't tell me that it isn't SUPER common to pull a smoldering bag of popcorn out of the microwave at least once a year.  Also, air-poppy-popcorn-maker-things can produce an impressive display of smoke when provoked.

I lit a pizza on fire once.  Actually, I think it was just smoking.  And it wasn't even burnt.  It was just smoking....go figure.

Today it was potatoes in one of those little infrawave countertop ovens.  Which is basically just a glorified toaster oven, and once again, NOT MY FAULT.  (Unless you consider that I was the one that set the timer and ended up with charcoal potatoes instead of lunch.)

But in all of my kitchen fire cases I have never caused any real damage.  Mostly they're just big shows of blackened food and plumes of smoke.  Every once in awhile I see actual flames, but they're usually tiny and die before I can even freak out or anything.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's something genetic. 

Once when my mom was young she set a high chair tray on fire with a stovetop.  It was so bad she had to beat down the flames with a baby blanket.

And when I was in high school, my older sister was baking some cinnamon rolls and I walked into the kitchen to find flames lining the element on the bottom of our oven.  I had to run out of the house like a lunatic, screaming, "The kitchen's on fire!!!" because my mom was shoveling snow off the driveway.  All my sister did was stand there and laugh at me like I was a dork, when it was HER fault there was a fire in the first place.

So if you think about it, even when I'm not using a toaster oven, it's not really my fault at all.  Although I should probably invest in a fire extinguisher.  Or just keep a couple of these around, you know, just in case:

p.s. You can still get a free photobook from Picaboo!  You have until the end of the month to order.  It's totally worth it.  Scroll down a couple posts and click on that box to get one.  And I mean it - IT'S TOTALLY WORTH IT.

Aug 14, 2010

not that it's shocking, but I'm seriously weird

I'm not looking forward to sending my kids back to school.  I know this is not a natural parental response, but can we extend summer a couple months?

My non-excitement may have something to do with getting to sleep in every morning.  And that I don't have to dress my kids if we aren't leaving the house.  And that I'm just not ready.

Luckily, we still have until the end of the month, and we have a last hurrah planned that will hopefully not turn into a cranky screamfest (cross your fingers, it involves nature, therefore I may be cranky and scream about it.)

The only good thing about going back to school is clothes shopping.  Unless you're poor.  Like us.  Then it's just a big chore.  But one that has occupied a few good days in the pursuit of online deals.  And if it's one thing I adore, it's online deals.

I used to have this really good friend named Ebay.  And I'd say, "Hey Ebay, find a good deal for me."  And then he would show me 3 pairs of Gap jeans for only $5.00.  But then a year or so ago, Ebay got a little stingey and when I would ask for a deal, he would just say, "Nope.  Instead you have to pay $25.87 for these used, faded, smelly-looking, toddler Converse sneakers.  Oh, and shipping is an extra $10.00."  So then I broke up with Ebay.

But I'm a forgiving person.  And it only took me about a year to get over it and give Ebay another chance.  And it actually paid off.  Amazingly so.  Ebay and I are on good terms again.

You see these boots:

Yeah, the kids aren't too shabby.  But the boots?  AMAAAAAAAZING!!!  I loved those things.  So I made Two Bits where them to death.  On the day the zipper finally gave out with a dramatic ripping and snapping, I threw open my arms and screamed to the heavens, "Curse you chunky ankles!!!!"  Even though Two Bits ankles are perfectly proportionate, and not chunky at all.  But it was a sad sad day, and something had to be blamed.

But the other night I was hanging out with Ebay at 1 AM, since there is nothing better to do than look for amazing online deals at 1 AM, and I found the SAME EXACT BOOTS in Two Bits current size.

It was fate.

I even got up at 8:00 the next morning to make sure I won them.  Someone tried to outbid me within the last 9 seconds.  Fool.  Like I would give up those boots so easily.

With the other deals I found on Ebay, combined with a super deal on tshirts at The Children's Place ($4.25 a piece, killer no?)  And some $10.00 jeans at Old Navy.  Plus some creative patching/sewing projects that will hopefully not turn into horrible fabric massacres.  And my kids have new clothes for school, and I didn't even have to bankrupt us to do it.  Yay.

It's just too bad they have to go back to school so soon.

Aug 2, 2010

two really great things

This is more of a relay of information post.  But it will still be worth reading - I PROMISE.

Distance for Davis   Distance for Davis   Distance for Davis

First of all, you need to check out the Distance for Davis fundraiser going on this week in Kaysville, Utah.  And also take note that on my Green Jello with Carrots blog I have announced that we will be donating ALL of our proceeds this week to Davis's family.  (And when I say "take note" I mean, go order something so we have more money to donate!  AND NOW.)


Second of all, I have a really super awesome great deal to share with you.  I'm not normally a deal sharer, but this one is fab-O-uloso!

Picaboo Promotional Banner

That's a free book.  A Picaboo large classic book.  FREE.  (That's a $30 value, people.) 

To get it, you have to be a new member to Picaboo and you HAVE TO ABSOLUTELY MUST click on that ad thingy from my website ('cause I make like 25 cents if you get one - WHOOOOO, money!!)  And they will email you a code to get the free book.  (And if you don't get that email, just let me know, because I'm all sorts of important and already know it.)

If you've never done a photobook before DO NOT be intimidated.  It's stinking super easy.  They have picture layouts all ready for you to drop pictures into.  (Or you can do your own page designs, if you want, which I usually want, but that's just me.)

So first go to the Distance for Davis website, then go to my Green Jello with Carrots website and BUY SOMETHING, and then click on that Picaboo box and get your FREE book.

See, totally worth reading.  I've never lied to you, I don't know why you doubted this post was chocked full of useful information (as ALL my posts are).