Oct 21, 2008

ugh.....my blog

If you have visited my blog between the times of 9:45 AM and......I'll let you know when I'm done....you'll have noticed that I'm having major layout issues. Total headache giving layout issues.

First of all, I have to say that I. HATE. CODE.

I took a class in college where we made little html coded tables. Happy tables. Easy ones. A total breeze, these html tables. I thought I could handle a little blogger code.

Not even close.

And what the heck is xml? How is it different than html? Why is it even in there? And why does that stupid fly that got into our house last night keep landing on my forehead?!! It's like the world is out to get me (in a coded, fly landing way.)

This all started because I wanted ads. Cool ones. I had fun signing up for different ads thinking things like, "Wooo-hoooo, KB Toys!" and "Oh yeah, this one is about BRAS!" Yeah it was fun. And I have to admit that my favorite ad is the "Develop Your Psychic and Intuitive Abilities" one. It is RAD.

Just to warn you, I am going to develop my psychic abilities and then invade of all your minds so that you blog ONLY about me. Good stuff too. Nothing rude like, "What's up with that Melissa idiot and her total lack in code deciphering skills? Sheesh what a moron."

So for my new ads I wanted to put them in their own column, so they wouldn't take over the better stuff in my regular column (like that cool picture montage of myself!) I didn't think it would be too much to ask for a 3 columned blog.

Was it too much?

Apparently, YES.

And now that I have the stupid 3 columns working, I can't get my header to reload. I don't know why. I've been through that code 53 BILLLLLLION times. Why won't it let me load a header?

Also, why can't I apply a cool background? I wanted to customize my blog since, you know, I was messing with code and layout stuff anyway.

Yeah, apparently that's really asking for too much.

And now everything reeks of the pugnant odor of crappy, ad-filled, header-less blog.


And in case you were wondering, this has not only resulted in ughy blogginess, but also very POOR parenting.

My younger kids napped right through the time I was supposed to leave and pick up my older kids from school. And I was so lost in tags (you know, these little things < >) that I didn't notice the time.

When I went to pick my Kindergartner up -ONLY 15 minutes after school got out- she was the the last child there, standing outside with a couple teachers, WAITING. Luckily no one asked me why I was so late - I was cooking up a good lie, just in case. Because really, what was I supposed to say, "Oh, you were just about to take my daughter to the office to call and ask why I forgot her at school? Yeah, I was too busy putting psychic and bra ads on my blog to remember that I had kids. Sorry."


Well, I wind myself up every morning... said...

I know you don't know me - I'm Tracy and I just blogged about blog troubles the other day. I just HAD to comment because I've SOOOOO been there. I feel your pain.

Good luck! I enjoy your blog.

Mine's at www.wevebeenmarriedhowlong.blogspot.com

Heather (n.) An organized mess. said...

That fly keeps landing on you because it's a barn fly, not a house fly. That means it's out to suck your blood, rather than sop up molecules of your food with those gross little puke tongues they have. Flies are .the. .nasty.

Also, I realize you are an adult... married with kids and such... but sometimes it strikes me... MELISSA is old enough to be married and have kids? WHAT?

And then I remember that I'm going to be 30 in 3 weeks and I cry.

Annie Valentine said...

I am totally impressed with you. I didn't even know what code meant until I read this blog. I am kind of "can't figure out how to post a photo on my sidebar" stupid.

*MARY* said...

I really like it, when I came to your blog I thought oh how cute. I didn't know ducks and spirographs went together so well.

the MomBabe said...

Dude, I can help you. for realios. how bout I send you a basic 3 column template and you can just switch out the backgrounds you like? I can even give you access to my photobucket account of digital scrapbook papers... if you're interested, or course.

LisAway said...

Ooo, the Mombabe has your back! Excellent.

We all feel your pain. Maybe not exactly the same sensation in the same spot (although I'm pretty sure it's almost always the rear end) because I've never messed much with html, but trying to make your blog do what you want it to? Not easy!!
Looks great, though!

Jen said...

Yeah. You are way cool. You are cool enough to use words (well, letter combinations anyway) like html. These kind of things scare me. If someone gave me a book that titled "Understanding HTML's For Dummies" I would run screaming in the other direction. I don't even want to know.

So yes, I have occasionally longed for three colums, but there is no way on earth it will ever happen on my blog.

So you rock. You and your three-colum-headerless blog. Can we be friends?

wonder woman said...

I used this website: http://www.sjhblogdesign.blogspot.com/

I haven't tried a background, but I know she tells you how to. But using mombabe's thing sounds a LOT easier.

I was up till 3 am changing my blog to 3 columns. I feel ya. But I like it!!