We can't find it. Half of one of those huge wipe refill packages has vanished. What kind of moron can lose a huge bag of wet wipes? Well, apparently me.
Hi, my name is Melissa - I am a moron.
It has probably retreated to the same hiding place as the 256 binkies we have lost. And I sure hope that the little plastic thingies from our sippy cup lids -that used to keep them from spilling- are keeping the newly escaped bag of wipes company. Because we certainly wouldn't want it to feel in any way saddened or guilty for TOTALLY ditching us in our time of need (ie. a leaking, poop filled diaper.)
You know, it would be one thing if we had taken it out of the house and then lost it. It the wide wide world of who knows where. But no - it never left the house.
WHERE COULD IT BE? I'm actually quite annoyed.
But then again it doesn't take much to annoy me these days. You know how a little while ago I said I was feeling moody? Yeah, well, apparently it's a prolonged moodiness. Which, from all points of view, is stinking LOVELY.
Husband just left to go to the store for more wipes. WHATEVER. He probably hid the wipes ON PURPOSE just so he could leave. What's wrong Husband, you can't handle a LITTLE MOODINESS? (That just happens to be lasting for weeks on end.)
I think it has something to do with our decision to not get pregnant again. Not that the actual decision is bothering me (because HELLO, the kids I have are driving me CRAAAAAAZY) but because of the thing required to keep me from getting pregnant. You know.....the THING.
For dinner we went to Carl's Jr. to let the kids run around their ginormous playland for awhile. And also because I hate making dinner. I witnessed Curly waiting for Screamer to catch up in his climbing so that they could go down the slide together (she knows that Screamer is still new to the whole "I think slides are ok" thing.)
I was so happily proud of Curly that I started to cry. IN THE CARL'S JR. PLAYLAND AREA (which smelled like feet, by the way.) It was so embarrassing. So then I hurried and wiped my eyes and told Husband that I had accidentally rubbed fry sauce in my eye and that's why they were watering. It's a good thing I'm a total liar, and also that my husband is particularly unobservant.
I don't know what is up with my crying lately. If my kids are cute, I cry. If Husband doesn't say that he absolutely adores everything that I do, I cry. If I see a puppy, or a monkey, or a really cute pair of socks, I cry. I cried 3 times yesterday. 3 TIMES. And I am SO NOT OK WITH CRYING. It should never happen. It totally ruins my mascara. And also my nose automatically turns scarlet after the first tear and a half escapes. But mainly because I. JUST. DON'T. CRY. EVER.
So if someone wants to let me know where my half package of wipes are hiding, or if you want to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me that the thing will eventually ease off of my tear ducts so I can actually feel like looking at those really cute socks without making up some lame fry sauce in my eye excuse, I would really appreciate it.
Hi, my name is Melissa - I am a moron.
It has probably retreated to the same hiding place as the 256 binkies we have lost. And I sure hope that the little plastic thingies from our sippy cup lids -that used to keep them from spilling- are keeping the newly escaped bag of wipes company. Because we certainly wouldn't want it to feel in any way saddened or guilty for TOTALLY ditching us in our time of need (ie. a leaking, poop filled diaper.)
You know, it would be one thing if we had taken it out of the house and then lost it. It the wide wide world of who knows where. But no - it never left the house.
WHERE COULD IT BE? I'm actually quite annoyed.
But then again it doesn't take much to annoy me these days. You know how a little while ago I said I was feeling moody? Yeah, well, apparently it's a prolonged moodiness. Which, from all points of view, is stinking LOVELY.
Husband just left to go to the store for more wipes. WHATEVER. He probably hid the wipes ON PURPOSE just so he could leave. What's wrong Husband, you can't handle a LITTLE MOODINESS? (That just happens to be lasting for weeks on end.)
I think it has something to do with our decision to not get pregnant again. Not that the actual decision is bothering me (because HELLO, the kids I have are driving me CRAAAAAAZY) but because of the thing required to keep me from getting pregnant. You know.....the THING.
For dinner we went to Carl's Jr. to let the kids run around their ginormous playland for awhile. And also because I hate making dinner. I witnessed Curly waiting for Screamer to catch up in his climbing so that they could go down the slide together (she knows that Screamer is still new to the whole "I think slides are ok" thing.)
I was so happily proud of Curly that I started to cry. IN THE CARL'S JR. PLAYLAND AREA (which smelled like feet, by the way.) It was so embarrassing. So then I hurried and wiped my eyes and told Husband that I had accidentally rubbed fry sauce in my eye and that's why they were watering. It's a good thing I'm a total liar, and also that my husband is particularly unobservant.
I don't know what is up with my crying lately. If my kids are cute, I cry. If Husband doesn't say that he absolutely adores everything that I do, I cry. If I see a puppy, or a monkey, or a really cute pair of socks, I cry. I cried 3 times yesterday. 3 TIMES. And I am SO NOT OK WITH CRYING. It should never happen. It totally ruins my mascara. And also my nose automatically turns scarlet after the first tear and a half escapes. But mainly because I. JUST. DON'T. CRY. EVER.
So if someone wants to let me know where my half package of wipes are hiding, or if you want to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me that the thing will eventually ease off of my tear ducts so I can actually feel like looking at those really cute socks without making up some lame fry sauce in my eye excuse, I would really appreciate it.
Comments
One more reason why when we are sure we are done having kids it's no longer going to be ME that prevents us from having children... if you get my drift :)
Besides... being on those things for a really long time can kinda mess things up... as far as I know.
Good luck with all that... and hang in there! I hate crying too... it sucks, especially over things that others don't expect you to cry over :)
I'm completely stoked! LOL
and the icing on the cake is I really like reading your stuff!
but the best part I like about your blog besides the layout is
YOU DO NOT HAVE word verification!! you Rock!
I used to cry all the time. Seriously - all the time. But since having my third baby, I just don't cry at all. At anything! My daughter has robbed me of all emotion...
And hopefully you find your wipes before they dry out and you don't get to use them at all.
I did NOT cry at Nights in Rodanthe, which is the appropriate place to blubber, for a woman of a certain age, which I hope I am not. I mostly laughed at the horrid acting.
I'll come back to visit you, funny lady.