Skip to main content

you can never have too many posts about boobs

Do you think anyone has ever really worn a coconut bra in seriousness?  Like they had nothing else to cover their boobs, so they were like, "Hey look, coconuts!" 

Because I seriously doubt it.

Just like I really highly doubt mermaids slap starfish to their chests and call it an ensemble.  Or use coordinating seashells.  Because seashells would be just as uncomfortable as coconuts.  And I think the starfish would probably just try to eat mermaid boobs if they were the bra of choice.

So that leaves one to wondering....

If you were trapped on an island filled with coconuts, but no bras, would you try it? 

Or would you reach into the ocean and look for some seashells/boob-eating-starfish?

Because I'm thinking, in that type of situation, I would just do what the women in remote parts of Africa do.  Just let it all hang out.  Let them sag and swing.  And, if need be, stretch them to feed hungry babies in opposite directions from two feet away.  Because I saw an African woman do that on tv once.

Plus, my boobs are already pretty saggy.  It's not like a couple of dorky old coconuts are going to keep them from dragging on the ground.

Comments

Kristina P. said…
You are preaching to the choir, sister!!
Juli said…
Love it! I choose commando style!! If you don't wanna see it, don't look!! :)
LisAway said…
None of the above. I would never put myself in a position to be trapped on an island.

Plus, coconuts don't come in my size. (at least not after I stop nursing)
Wonder Woman said…
The best days are ones where I have no reason to put on a bra. If I were marooned on an island, going commando would be a definite perk.
Barbaloot said…
Am I trapped by myself? Cuz if so, I probly wouldn't care. If there were people around, I'd use coconut leaves. They look a little more comfortable:)
Unknown said…
I'm sure after you had a kid people would run away screaming at everyone instead of being like Ow Boobs!! But this is why we all need Plastic Surgery!!
Rhonda said…
I can barely stand underwire, forget coconuts!!!

I've seen that African mother boob stretch thing before too. amazing. Ha HA!

Popular posts from this blog

GIVEAWAY (of the photo Christmas card variety)

I think I just creeped out my four year old. I pulled out the, "You'd better go to bed because Santa's Elves are watching you to make sure you're being good!" routine. His eyes got big, and round, and scared. And he said, "Why would they do that?!" Also, our church building burned down yesterday. No wait, it didn't. But the alarm went off, and the entire ward just sat there in the chapel (and gym, because we have an enormous ward.) I sat there too. I don't know what everyone else was thinking, but the thought going through my head was, "Can somebody please get that alarm turned off, it is WAY TOO LOUD!!!!" Seriously, I think our ward is now 37% deafer after that. Oh, and there was no actual fire. And the first fire truck to show up was driven by one of our ward members who was on duty that day. Good times. And now, that GIVEAWAY: For procrastinators everywhere (that would include me) I'm giving away one free photo Christmas card d

little pieces of my heart will be for sale at D.I.

I have this thing about my kids clothes. The thing is, I LIKE BUYING THEM CLOTHES. I get in trouble frequently for this. It's just that the old ones get so boring after awhile. And I hate it when the really cheap clothes look like poop after washing them a couple of times. Luckily, I live in a city that has outlet stores. I love outlet stores (and Ebay!) Alot of the time you can find higher quality clothes for Walmart prices so how could I NOT buy them? It would be like wasting money for me NOT to get a couple $4 shirts at OshKosh. Right? RIGHT?!! The problem is - we have tiny closets. Miniature, puny, ridiculous, TINY closets. The other problem is - I have saved EVERYTHING. Not only are the kids' closets chuck full of stuff, but we have multiple rubbermaid bins in our garage full of baby clothes they've all grown out of. Also, we may not be having any more children. And I say "may not" because if I say "for sure not" someone will have to co

The Barrel giveaway : SNIS Handmade Leather Goods

As seen in this month's issue of The Barrel I'm giving away one leather keychain or bracelet from SNIS . Their keychains crack me up.  In a really good way.  Like, if I was to ever have a grumpy day (like every day) and I see something like that on my keychain, then I doubt I'll be able to scream at my kids as well. Also, good news!  Even those of you who don't win can get 15% off everything in their shop!  Just enter the code: THEBARREL to get the discount. If you win this giveaway you get to choose the bracelet or keychain out of SNIS's etsy shop (and they have a bunch to choose from): All giveaways associated with The Barrel end on March 15th at 11:59 PM MT. Here's how to enter: 1- For ONE entry: visit SNIS's etsy shop then leave a comment on this post about which is your favorite product. 2- For another ONE entry you can "heart" SNIS's etsy shop. (Leave a separate comment telling me that you "hearted" them.)