I'm hiding in my room. Except that Monkey doesn't get the whole concept of "hiding." Because he won't leave me alone. He's handing me deodorant right now. Yeah, thanks, I smell fine. (Unlike some days....but what are you bringing that up for?)
I was just asking him to get his sister, since, being not quite 2 years old, she really ought to be semi-supervised. On occassion. Maybe.
As she walked in through the door I started singing, "There she is, Miss America..." in my best fake vibratic opera voice. And Number Four put her hands over her eyes like they do when the newly crowned Miss America cries on stage and doesn't want her fake eyelashes to fall off.
I think Number Four and I make a good pair.
Except when she's in her "Queen of the Universe" mood. Because I've already claimed that role, and there just isn't enough room for two queens here.
Speaking of Number Four, does anyone have any good asthma home remedies? She has Reactive Airway Disease and a cold that has lasted two weeks. I went to the dr on wednesday and said, "Her airways are starting to swell again - I can tell it's going to get bad. What can I do to prevent going to the ER (for the third time in two months)?" And the Dr said:
"I've never seen a purple cow,
I never hope to see one.
But I can tell you anyhow,
I'd rather see, than be, one."
Ok, not really, but that was about as helpful as what she did say. And so last night -exactly as I predicted- Number Four started having more serious breathing issues. She was panting and lethargic. But she wasn't blue, and she wasn't (audibly) wheezing. So instead of taking her to an ER where they would have pumped more steroids into her (how many steroid treatments can one toddler take before growing a mustache? really, I want to know) we stayed up most the night and did all we could for her at home. And prayed that she wouldn't die during the few hours of sleep we actually got.
And here's to hoping we don't have a repeat of last night. Unless, of course, someone out there has a brilliant suggestion we haven't already tried. We have a nebulizer with albuterol, vicks, a super humidifier, ibuprofen, and a snot sucking bulb syringe. Oh, and sometimes I make her eat peppermint candy canes left over from Christmas because I read online that peppermint tea was supposed to help.
Anything I'm missing? Anything at all. Just don't say steroids - I think she's had enough of those.
Did you guys watch The Office? (I'm changing the subject.)
Pam had her baby. I knew they were going to have a girl. I'm psychic like that. Just like Annie is having a girl, and CC is having a boy. And That Girl, is totally having a boy - I'm getting strong feelings about that one.
Did anyone else find it massively hysterical that Pam nursed the wrong baby? I don't know why, but that made me laugh like a lunatic. (Possibly I'm just a lunatic.) Oh, and also that the lactation consultant was a man. Funny stuff, man.
I remember when I had Two Bits and the lactation consultant (who luckily wasn't a man) was trying to help by grabbing a hold of things and yanking/smashing/squeezing while I kept my hands in the air in a gesture of complete surrender. Yeah....good times. Pretty safe to say that I never again let a lactation consultant touch me. Of course they'd always ask. And then I'd take off screaming, "Get away from my boobs!!!!!" in a high pitched squeel.
Ok, Miss America is now parading in princess dress-up heels licking the snot from her top lip. I should probably do something about that. She's going to fall and break an ankle in those shoes.