Jul 1, 2009

shnookums-pie

I have 14.7 minutes to write this post.

Because Husband turns THIRTY today, and we're going on a real live date. Dinner AND a movie. It's been awhile folks.

So you know my son? Monkey?


Yeah, him. He looks like a long-haired, sweety-pie, shnookums-poo darlin', no?

HE'S NOT.

We go outside. Out front. No fence.

Two seconds into it Monkey runs full board into the street, and I'm holding a squirmy one year old on the grass. Thank goodness we live on a slow street.

We go outside. Out front. No fence.

Two seconds into it Monkey takes off in stealth. I find him on our neighbor's front porch, hanging out in a chair. We don't know these particular neighbors yet. I'm just wondering how many times he rang their doorbell before taking a seat.

We go outside. Out front. No fence.

Two seconds into it Monkey spies our other neighbor's ornamental lawn lights. He tries ripping one out of the ground. It starts wiggling before I can nab him and shove him back through the door.

So outside just isn't working out.

We're inside. I'm cleaning, because we have so many ants here it's like there were no other place for them to hang out. In the world. Two seconds into this ant raid I look over at Monkey thinking, "Hey he seems shorter."

Probably because he had taken out the floor A/C vent and jumped into the open duct.

Yeah, he's a long-haired, sweety-pie, shnookums-poo darlin'.

8 comments:

Emmy said...

Do you have a fenced in back yard? I know that is one of the things I insist on having as I need the freedom to just send them out for a bit to keep me sane :)
Hope your date was fun! My husband turned 30 last March

Barbaloot said...

Put super glue on the bottom of his shoes. Then see how fast he can move:)

Have fun on your date tonight!

annie valentine said...

It's so good to see you. I've been hating blogland for the past two months, this is maybe the tenth blog I've ready since April. Why? Because when I saw your comment on my blog, I thought, "Gee, I love her. What's she doin' these days?"

So thanks for stopping to say hi because you're great.

wonder woman said...

Maybe a more appropriate name for him is Godzilla. Still an ape, but a terror as well. Ü Thanks for sharing.

Heather said...

He is sure cute.

marisa said...

My 2 year old monkey does the same thing...and oh yeah she can now unlock the screen door...so we have to keep the real door shut and it gets mighty warm beacuse we don't have AC where we live!
So if you have ants go to the store right now and buy these traps, they work wonders! Well you can wait until your husband is home b/c I know 4 kids in a store is just pure torture! The ant traps are called TERRO Liquid Ant Baits and they work miracles, set them out and seriously your ants will disappear. The BEST part they are kid friendly in case your 2 year old tries to consume them like mine did! I have bought mine at Lowes.

Miners, y'all said...

Melissa, some day our two boys will meet and they will form an infamous duo that wreaks havoc on living creatures from East to West. Secretly, we'll write a book about them and make mega bucks together, which will compensate for our loss of health and home after raising the adorable creatures.

Jaron and Michelle said...

He has to be the funniest kids ever!