Dec 8, 2008

Christmas in bulk

I think Costco should adopt us as their "Secret Santa" family. Wouldn't that be awesome? Except I don't think Costco really does that. But they should. Because I have my list all ready:

1 giganto box of toilet paper

52 boxes of Huggies in sizes 3 & 5 (that should last us a few weeks)

4 bottles of those gummy vitamin bears

A lifetime supply of wet wipes

27 pounds of pre-frozen chicken breasts

5 boxes of corn dogs or chicken nuggets or both

As many cans of fruit and vegetables that can fit into our garage (I'll even move the car, except I don't want canned peas or green beans, because they are nasty, although I'll take some frozen peas and someone pretending that I like green beans.)

27 tubes of cinnamon flavored toothpaste

A new digital camcorder (ours is starting to fossilize)

489 pounds of M&Ms in Christmas colors.

And then just a smattering of the fun stuff that they always throw into the center of the store. I found some really cute jeans for my kids there once. And one time we bought a package of 250,000,003 sheets of construction paper, but now we're all out of the red.

So if you know anyone that works in the "Secret Santa" department of Costco (that doesn't really exist), could you please hand them my list? And tell them that when Santa comes and drops it all off (with his massive delivery truck) I don't even care if his beard is fake.


LisAway said...

Oh, here's the box. Duh.

YOU FORGOT TO SPECIFY PEANUT M&M's!!! What a terrible oversight!

And is this really all you want. Why only 27 tubes of toothpaste? I can see you're really trying to take it easy on poor Costco.

wonder woman said...

This is the perfect list. I may copy it for myself. And you're both wrong - you need MINT m&ms that only come out at christmas!

Barbaloot said...

Wonder Woman is right on. The mint ones are the best---but only if they're the original. They make big ones now that are yucky.

And I hear you on canned peas and beans. Ew! I'll talk to my non-existent boyfriend who works in the non-existent Secret Santa dept. and see if I can get him to have your family be the priority.

Jen said...

I assume you also need a lifetime supply of those rotisserie chickens, because you can do just about anything or nothing with them. Except Costco will have to hire an elf to deliver them, because who has time to drive over there whenever you need one? I ditto your list.

Beeswax said...

I think I need to go to Costco now. But I don't want to brush my hair or put on a bra. Where can I get the mint M n Ms in a drive thru?

I need a Costco secret Santa too, apparently. Or,at least, delivery.

Claire said...

Emmm... they have cinnamon flavoured toothpaste? Why aren't we offered the same dental delights over here!?!?!