Jan 25, 2011

bangs and girth

Sometimes I have to let out a loud, "buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh," and then shoot puffs of breath up at my forehead to blow my bangs around for awhile.

I mean, what else is there to do?  Really?  Life is so dull these days, I have absolutely nothing on my to-do list and I've already managed to scratch my butt in sufficient amounts.  I wish there was a toilet to clean or something.

Ok, no. 

Trust me - I have PLENTY to do.  I hardly even ever have time to scratch my butt.  In fact, if I had more to do I would probably just lapse into a catatonic state do to overwhelmedness.

Maybe the bang puffing is like mini-catatonic-ness.

Probably.

Makes sense.

And in other news...

Last Christmas (you know, like a month ago) I got one of those pedaling things that you put under your desk so that you can be a dork and work out while actually working.  Except that my knees hit the slidey keyboard  ledge each time I pedal.  So I have to slump really low in my chair, which isn't really conducive to major work getting done.  And I mostly end up puffing my bangs while I pedal instead.

Also for this past Christmas my kids gave me the best gift they could think of: ankle weights.  Nothing says love like a pair of ankle weights. 

Actually I think it more says, "Hey mom, we think you're fat, why don't you do something about it already?!"

So I've been wearing ankle weights a lot these days.  Like all day.  Because I figure if running up and down the stairs 50 times a day wasn't enough to control my girth, then ankle weights SURELY will make the difference.

Opie's bus was like 5 minutes earlier than usual yesterday.  And I was still two blocks away.  Fine, a block and 3/4 away.  And if you're not at the bus stop they take your kid back to school.  So I had to run.  Pushing a stroller, with still-damp-shower-hair in the freezing cold, wearing ankle weights.

A few more days like that and my girth is going to be pulling a serious vanishing act.

Maybe those ankle weights were a good idea after all.

Also, I should probably cut my bangs.  Maybe I'd get more done....

7 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Maybe next year you'll get some pajama jeans after all that ankle weight workout!

That Girl said...

This is the whole reason I cut bangs.

annie valentine said...

Why didn't I think of ankle weights?

LisAway said...

And easier way to add weight and therefore get more exercise is to get pregnant. You should try that! Ha.

You are one of the busiest people I know. You totally deserve plenty of bangs blowing time.

Claire said...

I need ankle weights - to strap round my jaw. Perhaps i'd lose some of my chins if i had to lug those weights, every time I talked. Which is a lot.

Barbaloot said...

I like Clair's idea of chin weights:)

I was confused by the first paragraph---it's not like you to have nothing on your list.

T said...

and if nothing else - chopping off the bangs will slim you down by a few ounces.

better yet - weigh yourself WITH the ankle weights and then ditch them - Ta-Dah... instant weight loss!!!

girth, shmirth - that's what I always say :)