Jun 7, 2011

"I'm hungry!" "So are the piranhas, dear."

There is one more day of school left.  ONE. 

No wait.

Actually, HALF of a day of school left.  It's not even a full day.  I don't even know if it counts.

I have mixed feelings about this, because summer vacation means: a) sleeping in (which I adore above all else) and b) the kids being home all day long continually saying, "I'm hungry!" "But I want to be naked!" and "Mommy.  Mom!  Mommy!!  MAW-MEEEEEEEEE!!!!" (which I despise above all else).

The one that bothers me the most is "I'm hungry."  Because it's not like I don't feed them. Just that they refuse to eat real food at mealtimes and then whine about wanting snacks for the remaining hours of the day.

Even at night.  Honest to goodness.

A couple night ago Number Four woke up and started screaming for me, but when I got to her room all she wanted was a marshmallow.

And at 4:30 in the morning -having only gone to bed an hour and a half earlier- you just give your kid a marshmallow and crawl back to bed.  This is a general rule.  Unless, of course, you don't have any marshmallows on hand, and then you can do whatever you want.

So I'm enforcing a major consequence this summer (and possibly the rest of my children's lives) where they can't say "I'm hungry" or they have to take a swim in our piranha infested kiddy pool.

First I'll let them watch while I feed the piranhas a couple of their favorite stuffed animals.  And then, once the fluffy carnage subsides, I'll tell them the new rule so that its clearly imprinted on their brains. 

Hopefully it will keep me sane for 3 months; but I guess that really just depends on long I can manage to keep the piranhas alive, what with having no misbehaving kids to feed them and all.

And on a completely unrelated note, with absolutely no segue whatsoever, the June issue of The Barrel of Blogs is out:


JaNean said...

Loved your summer to do list in this latest issue. Watching all of Buffy again? Now that is what I call a great summer!! Plus featuring my friend Kim Orlandini was a great idea too, because as you have figured out, she is amazing.
I hope you and your kids survive the piranhas!

Melanie Jacobson said...

My 3 y.o. woke up at 2 a.m. yesterday and told me he couldn't sleep because it was "too dark." (He has a night light.) I had to get up and sing him songs for 15 minutes.

Jenny P. said...

Our last day of school is on Friday, except it isn't, really. See, the principal called everyone and told us that if we'd like to just come by the school and pick up our kids' report cards, and then sign them out for the day, they're absolutely fine with that. Nice way to say, "We want this school year over too, so don't bother sticking around!" I love our principal for this. Now, if only they wouldn't have separate end of grade award ceremonies for every grade, causing me to spend three hours in the school gym with a 1 year old and a 4 year old, I'd be a happy camper...

elesa said...

argh, the "I"m hungry" thing is the worst! He doesn't eat what I get for him and so he just tells me he is hungry all day. The new rule is that there has to be at least 2 hours between feedings, and if he tells me he is hungry before then, then I say "Too Bad". course my meals are mostly cold hot dogs and string cheese, but still! It's the principle of the thing!

The Empress said...

I'll be checking this out.

WIth Pulsipher contributing, it'll be state of the art awesome.