Feb 17, 2011

sometimes I pretend that I've frolicked with grizzly bears for no good reason because obviously it wasn't worth the imaginary effort I put in

The robins were ushered home on a warm nothernly breeze.  "Spring is coming!" they chirped gaily from the bare branches in the yard.

Throwing on a flowered parka, I lept from the house in a flutter of excitement. 

I danced in the streets and I frolicked through meadows, singing, "Tra la laaaaaa,"  catching the sweet, red-chested birds on my outstretched fingertips.  Our melody was harmonious to even the harshest of creatures, and soon our exuberant dance was joined by floppy eared bunnies and grizzly bears just awakened from hibernation.  The  foxes were doing the tango and the walruses tap-dancing.  All of us giving glorious thanks to Mother Nature for the introduction of warmer weather.

But in our excitement we had forgotten an important detail.

We had forgotten that Mother Nature has stopped taking her pills.

And Mother Nature, is quite obviously off her rocker.  Out of her head.  Completely MAD.

Yesterday morning we frolicked.

At noon it snowed, but with the sun still rejoicing and the air still warm.

Early evening brought a torrential hail storm that covered the Earth in a coat of white in under 3.27 minutes.

This morning we woke up to ice and snow.

The Robins are a little miffed they came without thinking to bring a big bottle of Prozac for Mother Nature (and possibly some Midol).

And our weather here is considered mellow.  Honestly, Mother Nature, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER.

Also, I do NOT own a flowered parka.  (I can't believe you thought that was true.  It's like you don't know me at all.)

14 comments:

Heidi said...

LOL! I live in the SF bay area and we had hail three times yesterday. It was cold enough out and the hail big and plentiful enough that there were still piles of it two hours later. It's amazing stuff. Sorry for your bipolar weather.

Heather Hudson said...

Hey Melissa,
I don't know you, but you sound so much like me that I love you already. I stumbled onto your blog when I was trying to figure out who one of the followers of my blog is. First of all, thanks for the laughs, and secondly, I really like your page! Did you do all of this yourself? Can you fly out here and do mine? I'm a writer/author-in-waiting, and my literary agency had me start a blog. I did. People like it, but it's very no frills. Suggestions? I'd love for you to check it out; you should read the post in Jan. about No Monthly Contracts. . .it suggests some of my faves. My site is http://heatherhudsonsays.blogspot.com

Rachel Sue said...

You should get a flowered parka. I think it would suit you. . .


(snort) I can't even write that without laughing.

Barbaloot said...

I was one of the untrusting souls that refused to believe in the good weather. Mother Nature is a jerk and I've learned my lesson more than once.

Susan said...

HAHA! Love it! i thoroughly enjoy your blog! The weather on the other side of the nation has been pretty nice lately...although it has been a bit squirrely this season.

Susan said...

HAHA! Love it! i thoroughly enjoy your blog! The weather on the other side of the nation has been pretty nice lately...although it has been a bit squirrely this season.

Wonder Woman said...

I went out sans coat yesterday. By 8 pm, it was sleeting.

NEVER go off the meds, Mother!!!!

T said...

and that's why I live down South - by the time Mother Nature gets down this way she forgets what upset her so greatly... of course, all that rain last night tells me that isn't always true...

and a close call on the flowered parka - I was going to have to arrange a fashion intervention.

LisAway said...

How funny is THAT! And when I read about you throwing on a flowered parka I thought, "Oh, I guess I really don't KNOW Melissa like I thought I did." SO glad you included that footnote!!

Heather said...

I can't stop thinking about what a tap dancing walrus would look like. I keep coming back to, "Me, in tap shoes."

Melanie Jacobson said...

Uh, yeah, and now She's over at my place having random crying jags all over our fail little town, so yes . . . give her some Midol. Can you do cloud seeding with that stuff, do you think?

elesa said...

Very awesome. Tap dancing walruses is one of the best things I've ever heard of.

Loralee and the gang... said...

I'd heard that this winter's El Nina would produce 16 times the snowfall that it had it the previous winter that had heavy snowfall. I thought he was just talking about our area, and I couldn't imagine that amount. But what is really happening is that the 16 times is spread over the entire country...crazy stuff...

mommabas said...

Now I know what to get you for Christmas; one flowered parka, straight up. Hope I can find one in orange.