You know how in scary movies there's always that bathroom scene where someone is getting ready for bed, and they open their vanity mirror to grab their toothbrush or antipsychotic medication or whatever, and then when they swing the vanity mirror closed there's a ghost or an axe murderer or a giant insect behind them? I can't even tell you how many times I think about that on a daily basis.
It's because my bathroom mirror looks like this:
Except we made our landlord replace the mirror with something less GRUNGING SINCE IN 1930. So for two weeks it actually looked like this:
Which temporarily helped me with my seeing-a-ghost/axe murderer/giant insect-behind-me-every-time-I-close-the-mirror phobia. However it was a humongous pain in the butt every time we wanted to actually see our reflections.
So anyways, I'm kind of tired of being freaked out every time I need to open and close that thing. Except the lack in storage space in that bathroom is way more scary than the thought of seeing a ghost/axe murderer/giant insect so I still use it. Plus also, I heard that if you have your toothbrush sitting out within 4 feet of a toilet, every time you flush you're basically giving your mouth a feces shower. And our bathroom is only about 5 inches big, so I HAVE to keep my toothbrush behind the mirror with a bunch of other stuff I use on a daily basis. Which means I have to open and close that thing like 15 times a day.
If I ever actually see a ghost/axe murderer/giant insect one of these days I will probably faint.
And since our bathroom is only 5 inches big there's really nowhere to fall without smacking your head on something.
So, most likely, I will die of head trauma and blood loss if I faint.
And if I die, I think I'm going to haunt people by showing up in their bathroom mirrors, because how much fun would that be?!
Loads of fun, I tell you. LOADS.
It's because my bathroom mirror looks like this:
Which temporarily helped me with my seeing-a-ghost/axe murderer/giant insect-behind-me-every-time-I-close-the-mirror phobia. However it was a humongous pain in the butt every time we wanted to actually see our reflections.
So anyways, I'm kind of tired of being freaked out every time I need to open and close that thing. Except the lack in storage space in that bathroom is way more scary than the thought of seeing a ghost/axe murderer/giant insect so I still use it. Plus also, I heard that if you have your toothbrush sitting out within 4 feet of a toilet, every time you flush you're basically giving your mouth a feces shower. And our bathroom is only about 5 inches big, so I HAVE to keep my toothbrush behind the mirror with a bunch of other stuff I use on a daily basis. Which means I have to open and close that thing like 15 times a day.
If I ever actually see a ghost/axe murderer/giant insect one of these days I will probably faint.
And since our bathroom is only 5 inches big there's really nowhere to fall without smacking your head on something.
So, most likely, I will die of head trauma and blood loss if I faint.
And if I die, I think I'm going to haunt people by showing up in their bathroom mirrors, because how much fun would that be?!
Loads of fun, I tell you. LOADS.
Comments
And the toothbrush feces shower thing? Oh sick.
And the toothbrush feces shower thing? Oh sick.
-Irwin Zinkin
Shower Doors Nassau County