I've had a drug-induced migraine for 3....ish....days now. It could be 4 days. What day is it?
My kids are completely inconsiderate of the fact that my head has been at the point of exploding and my stomach contents are about to be on display (because puking, or the feeling there of, also comes with migraines - the JOY).
Yesterday I said, "The next person to make a noise is going to lose their head."
And I said it really scary-like too. And I'm scary. SO SCARY.
The kids just gave me their, 'are you serious?' eyebrows and said, "What is that even supposed to mean? You're going to come cut our heads off? With what?"
And then I gave them the evil-glare-of-torturous-death as they ran away MAKING NOISE. Obviously my evil-glare-of-torturous-death is having less and less effect on them.
Thankfully my crazy eyeball pills, that are partly to blame for said migraine, will be iced on monday. (Yes, I said, "iced" as in "fitted with concrete boots and thrown into the river".) Because I'm finally having my surgery. I know, IT'S. ABOUT. TIME.
But that also means that I exchange the drug-induced migraine for a 2-week-mutant-vampire-eyeball.
At my pre-op appointment I asked for a prescription of loritab (or something similar-ish) and the pre-op lady was like, "What ever for?" And I said, "Because, why feel the pain when you don't have to?" Then she laughed and walked away. Rude. I wasn't even kidding. I think a handful of loritab isn't that much to ask for when I'm having my eyeball cut into, something inserted and pulled tight, and then sewn back together with shards of glass (or just regular stitches that FEEL like shards of glass, and therefor are pretty much the same thing.) And I HIGHLY doubt that I'm just being dramatic.
(Has anyone noticed that my abuse of punctuation is out of control in this post? Capitals and italics also count as punctuation, right?)
This blog was featured. Yeah. By invitation. (Although, I don't think she really knew what she was asking when she emailed me).
You can read it here: Best of the Web: Be @ Home
But you'll have to scroll past all the gorgeous crafty and inspirational stuff to get to the part about my awesomeness.
It's times like these that I think, "You know, I should really put something useful on here every once in awhile..............uhhh....na."