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other people's kids

I know other people do a good job raising their children, but honestly, everyone else's kids drive me insane. How could they be so obnoxious? I'm sure my kids NEVER annoy, boss around, or say anything rude to anyone...ever.

Curly has a little boyfriend in her preschool class. She talks about their wedding ALL the time. (I tell her she has to wait until she's 16 to call him her boyfriend, and then 22 to call him her husband.) But this little boyfriend is the inspiration for this post. He came to our house the other day and told us all what to to do and how and when to do it. Seriuosly annoying. He was even bossing me around....apparently he didn't realize that I could squash his little 5 year old head with just a single buttcheek (and it's too bad you can't threaten other people's kids to shut up or be sat on.)

But the bossing isn't even close to what came out of his mouth this morning on our way to school. We were all talking about birthdays (the PERFECT topic to get preschoolers started.) And Curly was excitely going on and on about her Princess and Prince Charming party she wants to have when "little boy" (I really don't need to use names) interrupts her with this, "She doesn't even know how to talk yet, and she's 4 years old!!!"

Ok, I know that my children have speech issues, and that articulation isn't Curly's strong point in life. But seriously, was it necessary to point that out? So I was thinking, if I knocked a couple of teeth out of "little boy"s mouth, then maybe he wouldn't speak so clearly and we could all point that out to him. But sometimes acting on my over-protective, motherly insticts doesn't always have the best results.

So instead of pummeling him from the drivers seat, we talked about how everyone sounds different when they talk, and that Curly talks her way, and that -of course- it's perfect and we love it.So it turned out ok, and I think Curly fully recovered from the confidence shattering criticism. AND, I'm pretty sure people don't raise their kids to be obnoxious, bossy or rude. AND, I'm also pretty sure that my kids can be just as annoying as everyone else's! (But just to be safe, if your kids come to our house make sure they know NOT to say anything about my children's speech problems, or I might have to whip out that buttcheek threat.....because I think I'm a little sensitive about the subject.)

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I have to make an announcement. But it's not one that I'm thrilled to make. For the past week I've been ignoring it so that, like the proverbial dog, it will just GO AWAY. Honestly, the odds of it just going away are slim to fat-chance, so I should just announce it already. I'm moving. To Utah. Every time I think about it, I also think I'm going to throw up. I know there's a lot of people who like living in Utah, so I don't want to offend anyone, but I HATE UTAH. Direly. And when I moved away a decade ago I vowed never ever ever ev-er to move back.  EVER.  ( Motherboard told me last week to never make that vow because then God HAS to force you to move back - - too bad her warning is about 10 1/2 years too late.) So now, I'm sure you're asking yourself, "If you hate it so bad, why are you moving?"  Which is an excellent question. Husband got a new job.  With real live actual benefits (jobs without benefits are, shall we